It is ok to feel like shit for it is a wake-up call.

When you feel like giving up, feel like nothing is working and things are in a downward spiral. Know that you are awake. Know that reality has finally caught up with you. Know that you have been tripping your balls off on some good drugs and now it’s time for hang over. Rejoice, celebrate.

When I used to feel bad I would go and watch TV, then I grew up. Now I read books or go on walks or try to count all the things that I am grateful for or may be meditate. But you know what it does not change the fact that I am feeling bad. I am feeling terrible and I want to destroy everything around me.

 I want to burn the world and all the shits of this world with it. Don’t get me wrong I am a good person. Almost as good as you but I can’t help it. I am awake. I am just awake. In this glorious moment of my anger and frustration I see the world as it is.  I see that all my friends are assholes, my loving family is rotten fish, my accomplishments are loads of crap, my girlfriend is a parasite, I am a delusional, judgmental, self-centered worm. Don’t think you are any better than me, I bet you are 100 times worse than me check that, 1000 times worse.    

Most people, even though they don’t know it, are asleep. They’re born asleep, they live asleep, they marry in their sleep, they breed children in their sleep, they die in their sleep without ever waking up.- ANTHONY DE MELLO

It is completely ok. It is ok to feel like shit. It is the best thing that can happen to anybody. Don’t fight it, don’t hold back, feel it, for it is freedom. Do not rationalize, do not divert attention, and don’t even listen. Be still and let the anger rise, sink in your depression, be there and it will show you what it was meant to show you.

Want a hint? It will show you an ugly world. See it. Would you rather sleep? Would you rather be in a broken dream?

why am I here?

"Everyone has his own specific vocation or mission in life… Therein he cannot be replaced, nor can his life be repeated. Thus, everyone’s task is as unique as is his specific opportunity to implement it."
~VIKTOR FRANKL

“Your work is to discover your work and then, with all your heart, to give yourself to it.”
~ Buddha

“You have a talent that is unique in its expression, so unique that there’s no one else alive on this planet that has that talent, or that expression of that talent. This means that there’s one thing you can do, and one way of doing it, that is better than anyone else on this entire planet.”
~ Deepak Chopra

“Everything—a horse, a vine—is created for some duty… For what task, then, were you yourself created? A man’s true delight is to do the things he was made for.”
~Marcus Aurelius

Why am I here?
What is my mission?
What am I here to do?

Would you rather sit and cry?

There is a story that goes something like this, A man was sitting and crying in a bus station. People were passing him by with out thinking twice. An elderly man stopped and asked "what are you doing?" "Crying" said the man. "Yes but why? a grown man like you shouldn't cry on the street, whats the matter?" asked the old man. "I got on a wrong bus, rode for hours and by the time I realized that I was going on a wrong direction i reached here". Old man could not understood so he asked "why don't you take a bus and go where you want to go?" The man looked puzzled, "but I have done a terrible mistake should I not be crying? should I not repent?" asked the man. "No! you should find the bus that is going to the destination you want to go" told the old man. "But". the man tried to reason. Old man interrupted him saying "would you rather sit and cry while your goal is still far away ? why not be sensitive next time, why not cry and run towards your goal , why not be a man instead of a cry baby?

So I ask you would you rather sit and cry? would cry and be fat? would cry and be skinny? would cry and be lazy? would you cry and be with that asshole/bitch? would you cry and continue studying the boring subject(EEE in my case) ?............?